5 Signs You're in a Relationship With a Narcissist

Most of the time, it is easy to spot the narcissist in your life. They are the ones who are working the crowd, loudly sharing fabulous stories that convey a sense of importance and accomplishment so that they can feel admired. Someone behaving like this tends to send out a clear signal to those around them that they are not approachable or compassionate.

According to the Diagnostic and Statistic Manual ,, which therapists use as a guide, a person needs to exhibit only 55% of the identified characteristics to be diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder

So below are all the traits and behaviors that are signs of a narcissist.

1- Perfectionism

You can spot a narcissist through their extremely high need for everything to be perfect. They believe they should be perfect, you should be perfect, events should happen exactly as expected, and life should play out precisely as they envision it.

This is an excruciatingly impossible demand, which results in the narcissist feeling dissatisfied and miserable much of the time. The demand for perfection leads the narcissist to complain and be constantly dissatisfied.

2- Lack of responsibility—blaming and deflecting

Lack of responsibility is a glaring sign of a narcissist. Although narcissists want to be in control, they never want to be responsible for the results—unless, of course, everything goes exactly their way and their desired result occurs.

When things don't go according to their plan or they feel criticized or less than perfect, the narcissist places all the blame and responsibility on you.

It has to be someone else's fault. Sometimes that blame is generalized everyone's out to get them. Most often, however, the narcissist blames the one person who is the most emotionally close, most attached, loyal, and loving in their life—you.

To keep the facade of perfection, narcissists always have to blame someone or something else. You are the safest person to blame because you are least likely to leave or reject them.

3- Gallighting

Gaslighting is a form of manipulation and emotional abuse, and it’s a hallmark of narcissism. Narcissists may spew blatant lies, falsely accuse others, spin the truth, and ultimately distort your reality.

for example

You feel like everything you do is wrong.
You always think it’s your fault when things go wrong.
You’re apologizing often.

4- They think they’re right about everything… and never apologize

arguing with a narcissist is impossible.

“There is no debating or compromising with a narcissist, because they are always right,” “They won’t necessarily see a disagreement as a disagreement. They’ll just see it as them teaching you some truth.”

5- They’re entitled AF

They show up for work late, leave early, and miss deadlines. But they definitely deserve that pay raise, right?

A narcissist believes they’re entitled to the best with very little effort. Unfortunately, when this doesn’t come to fruition, the result is often drama and tantrums, a lá toddler-style.

A narcissist might also believe they’re too special to carry out certain tasks. Think about that housemate who refuses to clean the toilets or take out the bins because that’s “beneath them,” or a sibling who refuses to come to your party because the bar you’ve chosen isn’t exclusive enough.

It can feel downright unfair to coexist with a person who moves through the world with such a haughty sense of self. You may be working extra hard for what you have, while they skate along on so little.

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Ali Mousa Relationship Blogger & writer