Why Empaths and Narcissists Attract: 5 Ways for Empaths to Protect Themselves

Why Empaths and Narcissists Attract: 5 Ways for Empaths to Protect Themselves

It's said that opposites attract. There is a rule goes: people who are poles apart might be drawn together for all the wrong reasons. For instance, narcissists are drawn to those who will be most useful to them. This frequently means that they seek out and pursue empaths.

Narcissists are the opposite of empaths. Empaths are extremely sensitive and tuned into other people's feelings, in contrast to narcissists who lack empathy and feed on the desire for admiration. Empaths are "emotional sponges," easily absorbing the emotions of others. Because they see someone who will genuinely satisfy all of their needs, narcissists find them to be incredibly alluring.

As an empath, your kind and caring nature makes you a prime target for those who want to take advantage of others. While your empathy is a gift, it requires strong boundaries to avoid becoming depleted by narcissists. You need to learn how to protect your energy and set limits. Otherwise, narcissists will latch onto you and drain you dry. The good news is there are effective strategies you can start using right away to avoid attracting narcissists and shield yourself from their manipulation. By strengthening your boundaries and listening to your intuition, you can continue using your gift of empathy without fear of abuse. It's time to stop being a narcissist magnet and start valuing yourself.

Why Empaths and Narcissists Are Drawn to Each Other

Empaths and narcissists often find themselves drawn to each other in relationships. Why is that? As an empath, you need to understand the dynamics at play so you can protect yourself.

• Empaths are natural givers with a strong ability to understand others' emotions and perspectives. Narcissists, on the other hand, are takers who lack empathy. They feed off the compassion and validation of empaths.

• Empaths tend to be optimistic and see the good in people. Narcissists are skilled manipulators and know how to charm empaths into showering them with praise, affection, and forgiveness.

• Low self-esteem and a desire to please make empaths vulnerable to narcissists. The empath hopes their love and sacrifice will "heal" the narcissist, who lavishes them with attention and affection. But narcissists rarely change.

• Codependency is common in empaths. They look to relationships to feel worthy and valued, and narcissists are happy to exploit that. Empaths get caught in a cycle of trying to win the narcissist's approval and love.

• Narcissists lack boundaries and demand constant attention. Empaths struggle to say no for fear of angering or abandoning the narcissist. But empaths need boundaries to protect their energy and wellbeing.

Learning to spot the signs of narcissists, improve your self-worth, set boundaries, and avoid codependency can help you break this painful cycle. You deserve healthy, mutually caring relationships where you feel seen and understood. Protecting yourself is the first step.

Here're 5 Ways How Empaths Protect Themselves From Narcissists

1- Set Clear Boundaries

To protect yourself from narcissists, you need to establish clear boundaries and enforce them. This can be challenging for empaths, but it's essential for your wellbeing.

• Politely but firmly say "no" when you need to. Don't feel guilty about it. Your time and energy are valuable, so don't let narcissists take advantage of your kindness.

• Limit the time you spend together. See the narcissist in short bursts instead of prolonged engagements where they can manipulate you. Meet in public places if possible.

• Don't share personal details. The less narcissists know about you, the less they can use against you. Be vague and change the subject if they pry.

• Don't make excuses for their behavior. Hold narcissists accountable for their actions instead of rationalizing their toxicity. Their issues are not your responsibility to fix.

• Trust your instincts. If someone makes you feel bad about yourself, that's a sign they don't deserve access to you. Listen to your intuition - it's there to protect you.

• Set consequences when boundaries are crossed. Be prepared to limit contact with narcissists who continue to disrespect you. Your mental health should be the priority here.

• Get support from others. Talk to people who love and support you. Let them remind you of your worth and strength so narcissists cannot make you question yourself.

You deserve relationships where you feel heard, respected, and cared for. By establishing boundaries, you can protect yourself from narcissists and open up space for healthy connections. The more you practice, the easier it will get. You've got this!

2- Don't Take the Bait

Narcissists are adept at manipulating emotions and pushing buttons to get a reaction from empaths. They may use insults, criticism, or emotional outbursts to provoke you. Do not engage or argue. Remain calm and detached from their attempts to upset you.

• Do not justify, defend or make excuses for your actions or feelings. Do not take the bait to explain yourself. Narcissists will use any information you provide against you.

• Do not attack or criticize the narcissist in return. This will likely escalate the situation and cause further emotional harm. Remain neutral in your responses without showing anger or aggression.

• Set clear boundaries and do not bend them. Be firm in communicating your limits while also remaining polite and courteous. Do not feel obligated to please the narcissist or meet their unreasonable demands.

• Do not try to reason or have a logical discussion. Narcissists are not interested in compromise or finding common ground. Remove yourself from the interaction as quickly as possible.

• Do not share personal details or be emotionally vulnerable. Any information you disclose will be used to manipulate and hurt you. Keep conversations superficial and do not open up to a narcissist.

Protecting yourself emotionally from narcissists requires discipline and self-control. Do not give them power over you by reacting to their manipulations and provocations. Remain detached from their attempts to get a reaction and do not bend to their will or demands. Set clear boundaries to limit contact and do not share personal details that can be used against you. The less ammunition you provide, the less influence they will have. Stay strong in yourself!

3- Trust Your Intuition

As an empath, you have a strong intuition. Learn to listen to it, especially when it comes to the people you allow into your life. If something feels off about someone, there's probably a reason.

Your intuition may sense things that aren't obvious on the surface. Pay attention to any nagging feelings that a person isn't being genuine. Look for inconsistencies in their words and actions. Do they say one thing but do another? Do their facial expressions match their tone of voice? Trust your gut if their behavior seems manipulative or self-serving.

Don't ignore red flags just because you find someone charming or interesting. Narcissists are skilled at using flattery and superficial charm to win people over. They may shower you with affection and compliments to get what they want from you. But their actions won't match their words in the long run.

Go slowly in new relationships and watch for patterns. Don't feel pressured to commit or share personal details until you've seen someone's true colors. Your intuition is your best defense against narcissists and other toxic people. The more you listen to it, the stronger it will become.

Stay true to yourself. Don't change who you are just to please someone else or win their approval. Healthy relationships are based on mutual care, respect, honesty and trust. If you have to pretend to be someone else, that person is not right for you.

You have a gift for sensing other people's emotions and intentions. Learn to fully embrace this ability and let it guide you. It will help you build genuine connections and avoid unhealthy relationships. The more you trust your intuition, the less power narcissists will have to manipulate you.

Related Article:  How Empaths Can Outsmart Narcissists (9 Ways)

4- Withdraw Your Supply

• Stop Feeding Their Ego

Narcissists crave constant praise, admiration, and ego-stroking from those around them. As an empath, you likely provided this willingly, boosting their self-esteem and sense of importance. To withdraw your supply, stop complimenting them, flattering them, and boosting their ego. Don’t react when they brag or fish for praise. Your admiration and approval fed their ego, so cutting them off from that source of supply will weaken their hold over you.

• Stop Caretaking

As an empath, you likely took care of the narcissist’s needs while ignoring your own. You may have made excuses for their behavior, cleaned up their messes, and fixed problems they created. Stop caretaking and let the narcissist deal with the consequences of their own actions. Don’t cover for them or make their life easier. Take care of yourself for a change and make your needs a priority. The narcissist will not like losing their caretaker, but you must stop enabling their behavior.

• Become Boring

Narcissists feed off the drama, emotions, and reactions of others. Deprive them of this source of supply by becoming boring. Stay calm and detached. Don’t engage or argue. Respond in an unemotional, disinterested tone. Be polite but disengaged. The narcissist will likely act out to provoke a reaction, so remain detached and reiterate your boundaries. Your lack of reaction and drama will cause them to lose interest, as they no longer feel in control or able to manipulate you.

5- Spend Time With Supportive People

Surrounding yourself with people who love and support you is key to protecting yourself from narcissists. Make time for friends and family who treat you well and boost your confidence and self-esteem.

• Lean on people who appreciate you for who you are - your sensitivity, compassion, and kindness. Those who make you feel good about yourself will help balance out interactions with narcissists.

• Talk to others who have had similar experiences. Speaking with fellow empaths who have dealt with narcissistic relationships can help you feel less alone and gain useful advice. Look for online support groups or forums to connect with like-minded individuals.

• Be wary of those who drain your energy. While spending time with positive people, also watch out for emotional vampires - those who leave you feeling depleted and inadequate. Limit contact with people who make unreasonable demands on your time or emotions.

• Make self-care a priority. Engage in regular activities that replenish your mental and physical health like exercising, meditating, journaling, or pursuing hobbies. When you feel your best, you'll have more strength and clarity to establish boundaries with narcissists.

The people you choose to spend your time with can have an enormous impact on your wellbeing and self-esteem. Surround yourself with those who appreciate you for who you are, and be cautious of those who only take from you. Nurturing supportive relationships will help you feel empowered to protect yourself from narcissistic abuse and establish healthy limits. Make sure to also schedule in regular self-care - you deserve it!

Conclusion

So there you have it, empath. Now that you know the reasons why narcissists are drawn to your light and the ways they try to dim it, you can build your defenses. Don't let anyone make you feel like you have to change who you are to be worthy of love and respect. Your ability to care deeply is a gift, not a weakness. Learn to set boundaries, trust your intuition, and value yourself. When you do meet someone who appreciates you for who you are, your light will shine even brighter. But for now, keep that light protected until you find someone who treats you well and nurtures your radiance. You deserve nothing less. Stay strong in yourself!