10 Signs You Are Being Emotionally Abused
Abuse of any kind is complex, and it can be difficult to define. This is
especially true of emotional abuse: with physical abuse, there is often
tangible evidence of violence, but emotionally abusive relationships can
involve complex and toxic mind games. If you've ever experienced unexpected
emotional manifestations, you may have felt the effects of emotional abuse
(without even knowing it) at times, it's hard to tell if you're having normal
relationship issues or are being manipulated. “If someone is physically
violent, this is clear and obvious,” “emotionally abusive relationships are
more subtle.”
Studies show that these relationships usually begin exceptionally well before
problems worsen over time. "Every time, you become more adaptable to negative
patterns, so it gets harder to see — and so does leave." Many victims of abuse
discover the harmful effects over time. After all, if the abusers behaved this
way from the start, how would they develop relationships from the start? It's
all about timing.
“There is a story [that] if you throw a frog into a pot of boiling water, it
will rush out,” but if you put the frog in the water while the water is still
cold—and slowly raise the temperature—the frog [stays] until it boils to
death. The same thing happens in relationships.
If you experience any of the following 10 things, you are in an
emotionally abusive relationship.
1- Threats:
If your partner threatens you in any way, you may feel that you are in danger.
Coercive "if, then" statements can include blackmail, threats of physical harm
or suicide, or other frightening remarks, but they often share the same
intent: to support victims in a corner (and prevent them from leaving).
2- Blame:
Victims are often forced to believe that they cause - and therefore deserve -
their mistreatment and misery, which makes breaking the cycle more difficult.
This can be exacerbated by the shame many victims feel for letting their abuse
continue.
3. Contempt by joke & humor.
Verbal abuse is often disguised as jokes. Your aggressor teases you, makes fun
of you, and insults you with sarcastic remarks about your appearance,
personality, abilities and values. He makes fun of you in front of your
friends and family because he knows you'll avoid public confrontation. If you
ask him to stop, he tells you that you are too sensitive or you can't joke
4- Stonewalling:
Stonewalling occurs when a partner refuses to talk or communicate. If your
partner shuts down uncomfortable conversations, it can feel like abandonment.
Their refusal to discuss issues may appear as a refusal or a lack of concern
for your feelings.
5- Gaslighting:
A type of psychological manipulation that makes the victims doubt their
memory, judgment and reason. If you find that your fears (and even your
memories) are often dismissed as "false," "stupid," or "crazy," you may be
suffering from gaslighting.
6- Excessive defensiveness:
When you constantly feel like you have to stand up for yourself, there is less
room for positive communication. It's important for both parties to be able to
talk openly - and honestly - with each other to resolve issues. Benton says
that over-defense can feel like you're in a fight where your shield is always
on top.
7- Controlling:
Your partner may appear to be overly invested in your social life, or monitor
your daily routine without acknowledging your desires. You are not free to
make your own decisions (either overtly or subtly). Even small comments that
undermine your independence are a way of controlling.
8- Isolation
Isolates you from your friends or family: Some people who hurt them
emotionally try to isolate their partners, while others unconsciously apply
tactics that achieve the same result. When you are in less contact with your
friends and family, it is easier for your partner to continue to abuse you
without taking responsibility. Furthermore, if you feel that your partner is
the main source of companionship, it will be difficult for you to make the
decision to leave the relationship. If this situation sounds familiar, you
should at least consider the possibility that your partner created it.
9- Volatile Relationship:
If the relationship is constantly interrupted due to mood swings, this may
indicate abuse. Many people experience natural ups and downs, but it is a
problem when they harm one's partner. Capricious abusers often shower their
victims with gifts and affection after a spree, only to get angry again soon
after.
10- No personal Space.
At first, it's nice how protective they are of you - how slightly jealous they
are of the idea of you being with anyone else. But then protection turns
into possession. They start to get paranoid. Anytime they text or call you,
they expect you to respond right away. They are always wondering where you
have been, who you were with, and what you did. They may accuse you of
cheating. The intensity of the relationship begins to feel suffocated
No comments
Post a Comment