6 Strategies for Coping With A Narcissistic Boss

 6 Strategies for Coping With A Narcissistic Boss

"How do I deal with my narcissistic manager?" is the most common complaint I receive about individuals struggling in the workplace. Dealing with a narcissistic manager is one of the common challenges faced by employees in a work environment. The narcissistic personality is characterized by an excessive sense of self-importance, self-love, and a strong desire to attract the attention of others, which may lead to difficult behaviors that can negatively affect the team and the overall work environment. They generally seek higher positions to help themselves feel satisfied because they unconsciously feel inadequate and deficient. They need people beneath them to reassure them that they are "superior." But this is never enough. Therefore, individuals must be aware of the traits of this personality and how to deal with them wisely and firmly.

What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

The narcissistic personality is characterized by inflated sense of grandiosity and hungry for admiration & attention. People with this disorder may lack the ability to understand or care about the feelings of others. But behind this mask of extreme confidence, they are not sure of their self-worth and are easily upset by the slightest criticism.

It is important to note that your bad boss may not necessarily suffer from narcissistic personality disorder, but they can still exhibit narcissistic traits and behaviors. Here are six signs indicating that your boss or manager is narcissistic.

What are signs your boss is narcissistic?

1. Excessive Self-Confidence: 

The narcissistic manager displays an excessive self-confidence that can border on arrogance. They believe they are superior to others and expect constant appreciation and bias towards their ideas and decisions without any room for discussion or criticism. They always see themselves as the heroes who can never fail. Therefore, narcissistic bosses thrive in an environment surrounded by individuals who feed their self-image through praise or admiration.

2. Exploitation of Others: 

The narcissistic manager uses others as tools to achieve their personal goals without consideration for their needs, feelings, personal, or health circumstances, as long as their interests are met, and their decisions are executed.

3. Lack of Social Harmony: 

The narcissistic manager lacks the ability to empathize and understand others' feelings, leading them to exhibit unfriendly or humiliating behaviors towards others. Don't be surprised by their sarcastic remarks, bullying, or indifference to your feelings or complaints.

4. Desire for Power and Control: 

The narcissistic manager always seeks dominance and control, preferring to be the sole decision-maker in all matters without appreciating others' opinions. There's no room for criticism, discussion, or argument, or else you become their enemy, and matters become overly personal towards you.

5. Aggressive Response to Criticism: 

The narcissistic manager handles criticism with extreme sensitivity, responding aggressively or completely ignoring criticisms, which increases tension in the workplace.

6. Never Acknowledge Employee Achievements: 

Narcissistic bosses dislike acknowledging the talent or achievements of others because it threatens their sense of deserving spotlight and appreciation. If they have to praise someone, they will attribute another person's success to themselves, framing it within the context of their wise leadership and excellent guidance.

What can you do if you have a narcissistic boss?

1. Maintain Clear Boundaries: 

Clearly set boundaries between your work and personal life. Be consistent in what you can accept and tolerate and what you cannot. Express this calmly and respectfully, using positive non-confrontational or aggressive language. Don't allow the narcissistic manager to cross those boundaries, as what you tolerate today voluntarily or out of embarrassment may become genuinely acquired tomorrow, imposed on you in a way that suffocates you and subjects you to constant pressure.

2. Develop Effective Communication Skills: 

The better you can express your opinions and needs clearly and respectfully, avoiding expressions of anger or feeling provoked, the better. Also, avoid competing with them or trying to embarrass them or appear more competent and trying to steal the spotlight from them. Possessing verbal and non-verbal communication skills shows your confidence and self-respect, clearly, firmly setting your personal boundaries confidently, and respectfully.

3. Don't Play the Victim: 

If you have issues with your narcissistic boss, don't wander around the office or the company complaining about your problems with them. Constantly complaining to your colleagues hurts your reputation and may ultimately reach your boss, damaging the relationship even more. Beware of engaging in gossip or spreading stories implying that your boss wants to harm you, as they may become self-fulfilling prophecies. In a few words, "less talk, less trouble."

More importantly, if there are already performance issues or areas that need improvement, it is better to listen to reason and work on it rather than deny it and create a conflictual environment with a manager who may be right, even if they express it in a way that doesn't, please you. Addressing the root of the problem will close the door to any opportunity they might use against you.

4. Seeking The Support: 

Seek support from coworkers or other managers who may be sympathetic or understanding. They may have valuable advice on how to deal with the narcissistic manager. It is essential to do this smartly without appearing to complain about them or causing them embarrassment in the company, as it may increase their abusive and retaliatory behaviors towards you.

5. Self-Care: 

Taking care of yourself through activities like exercise and relaxation will help you become less stressed and better able to handle the pressures emanating from your life consciously and calmly. Surrendering to despair and stress makes you a perfect and very prepared victim for falling into the traps and deceptive tricks set up for you.

6. Look for Other Job Opportunities:

In some cases, it may be better to look for other job opportunities if dealing with the narcissistic manager negatively affects your mental health and happiness at work. You need to step out of the bubble of negativity and intense focus on this person's behavior. Think carefully about the advantages of being in that job alongside the disadvantages, so you can decide what's best for you. Importantly, your decision to leave should be well-planned and not impulsive or rash.

• Enhance your professional and personal skills
• Set your goal
• Organize your financial situation
• Consult with specialists 

So that your decision is correct and helps you move out of that slump into a better phase.