Truma bonding sings & tactics

Truma bonding sings & tactics

What is truma
bonding?

According to medical news today definition, 
Trauma bonding is psychological response to abuse. It occurs when the abused person forms an unhealthy bond with the person who abuses them.

The person experiencing abuse may develop sympathy for the abusive person, which becomes reinforced by cycles of abuse, followed by remorse.

How you become a truma bonded?

When you are showered with a lot of fake love ,care and concern ,Its feels like a dream coming true
Once the control is established, the abuse start and the mask falls off

You are deprived of everything including the respect that you deserve as a human
To keep you hooked, the abuser shown an occasional , but intense act of fake love mixed with apology

So

How often have you been labelled as codependent, insecure or aviodant, borderline?

How often have you been made feel that there is something wrong with you or you are broken and thus, need to be fixed?

If your answer is "a lot of times", Keep reading

Attachment trauma is a wound that manifests in so many forms and faces, be it so-called codependency, avoidance or aggression or withdrawal.

It is an injury that is labelled in a way to suggest that you are cause of your pain. You are the reason why you had to go through abuse.

All of it may seem very valid when you hear it from a "guru", from someone, who blames you for experiencing trauma as a child, at a age where you didn't have a choice but to go through the painful experience.

As victims, many of us are made to believe the lie that we are broken and thus, need to fixed in someway.

However, the real cause behind these survival mechanisms, these behaviours is the ACUTE LACK OF SAFETY in a relationship, not the notion that you are broken.

When you don't feel safe with a partner or your past experiences with the primary care taker have very been painful, you employ survival mechanisms in present relationships to make sure that you aren't hurt.

So, the key to healing the attachment trauma ISN'T isolation or just working on "self" or unraveling past traumas, it is to form a safe relationship with someone who could help you to co-regulate.

Who could allow you to be yourself without threatening your integrity, who could help you feel safe to express yourself

Source : Danish Bashir| Narcissist Abuse Recovery Professional