The 5 Most Common Types for Narcissistic Blaming Shifting

The 5 Most Common Types for Narcissistic Blaming Shifting 

People with narcissistic personality disorders regularly use blame shifting to manipulate conflicts within themselves because admitting a mistake is not an option for them. Here's everything you need to know about narcissistic blame shifting. 

The existence of a malignant narcissist depends on drawing the narcissistic supply from others. The narcissist will easily engage in shifting blame when he experiences a narcissistic injury, or his partner has set boundaries with him, or cut off the narcissistic supply, leading to the narcissist's feeling of a lack of control / power. 

What are the most common techniques for narcissistic blaming  shifting ?

1. Playing the victim 

Playing the victim is the most common type of blame shifting. When you notice his mistreatment towards you and indicate that it is causing you pain. With this situation that paints you as a victim, they quickly turn the tables (because they always need to be the most pitiful victim). 

Instead of addressing your legitimate concerns, they will bring up something from the past that is completely unrelated to the matter, claiming that you are the one causing the pain. So you become the one who apologizes to them out of guilt.

2. Underestimate your feelings

Assume that they have offended you and that you mentioned it to them right away. They will immediately ignore your feelings, nullify them and laugh at your being too sensitive and emotional. You are very sensitive. You are crazy. You are hysterical. You have no sense of humor. Calm yourself!

It is no longer they are blamed for misbehaving when they mistreat you but instead it is yours for your reaction to their misconduct. Ironically, if you criticize a narcissist the way he regularly criticizes you, they are turning on you.

3. Arguing About the Argument

each argument becomes a meta discussion about the argument itself, rather than the point you are really trying to make. Instead of focusing on the actual point of discussion, they comment on your voice, gestures, and pitch, accusing you of doing the things they are doing (victim playing, gas lighting). It was no longer the blame for them, but instead the way you handled the conflict

4. Guilt tripping

If you tend to feel compassion for others, then it is likely that they will fully benefit from this. If you point out something painful they did, they will start talking about their abusive childhood or their evil ex-partner. Before you know it, you are comforting them, even though they are hurting your feelings. After all, how can you get angry with someone when they open up to you about something so painful? Now the urgency of the focus is shifted to their painful past rather than your current anxiety. They drag you into pointless fights, inserting words and discussing the semantics in order to put you on the defensive.

Everyone goes through trials and tribulations. But healthy individuals do not use these experiences as excuses to hurt others, and they certainly do not present these stories of compassion to avoid taking responsibility for their behavior easily.

5. False Accusations

This stink bomb is the last resort .Usually when they're caught blatantly or summoned for something they know they've done wrong. (Remember, shyness is an unacceptable sensation for people with narcissistic personality disorders.) So they bring you a terrible and unfounded accusation. Like:

• - You offended me.
• - You hit me - You raped me 
• - You cheated on me 
• - You never liked me 
• - You are mentally sick 
• - You are chasing me 

Suddenly you are now defending yourself against the wild accusations that you could not even imagine being brought against you. Who could be prepared for that? And again, that's the point. The blame is now far from them, and now you're in hot water. Now you easily find yourself fighting to win your case.

Related:  7 effective ways to deal with Gaslighting

How to Cope with blame shifting? 

• When blaming someone turns out like this, there is a (understandable) temptation to explain yourself, defend your name, and prove your point. But the problem is, this is exactly what they want you to do.
• They change the blame so you will respond. So you give them the attention they need. They will always accuse you of doing everything they themselves do because it gets infuriating when you just have to say something. But again, that is the goal. 
• By absorbing you in these arguments, they consume your energy and watch that you are gradually destroying yourself, so that they can use your reactions to prove their own points. ("Wow, look how bitter and angry you are!")
• When you try to defend yourself against a false accusation, you legitimize it even by admitting it. The only way to respond to these tactics is to stand up and walk away. Just go away.

Related:  14 Lies a narcissist Says to keep you Hooked

Source:

themindsjournal.com/5-types-of-narcissistic-blame-shifting