10 Things You Should Never Tolerate In A Relationship
No one is perfect. This is especially true in relationships, and you know it.
No matter how much you want to pretend that your significant other has no
faults, at the end of the day, you have to admit that everyone has flaws, no
matter how much we love them.there is nothing wrong with waiving this point.
Love is not about infatuation so strong that you cannot see the true person
behind the ideal, it is about a commitment so deep that you find yourself able
to transcend the unpopular qualities of someone; You see how deficient this
person is, and you love him anyway.
As always with romance, you need to be careful. compromising, meeting midway,
and accepting your loved one are all important if you want a satisfying
relationship, but you cannot allow yourself to become a victim. There are
certain behaviors you should never tolerate in your significant other, no
matter how much you might find them attractive, stimulating, and likable.
f
you find yourself with someone who displaying the following traits, you should
at least say something.
Here are 10 Things You Should Never Tolerate In A Relationship
1. You Are No A Priority.
People get busy. Schedules become packed. We run out of time to do the things
we really want to get done. But that doesn’t mean that you should constantly
accept second-place when it comes to your relationship. You deserve to be
treated like a priority because, well, you should be one to the person who
loves you. You are special and if someone doesn’t prioritize you in their
life, then you don’t belong there.
2. Clingy & Needy partner
Of course, feeling wanted and needed in a relationship is normal, but it can
go overboard if you’re not careful. Most people enjoy having a partner that
asks them for help with certain things or just needs a hug or a shoulder to
cry on sometimes. These things are perfectly normal – what isn’t normal,
however, is an overly clingy, needy partner who can’t seem to do anything
without you.
It’s important to feel like you can live on your own without your SO around
24/7, so a partner who doesn’t display any independence should be a red flag
to you.
3. Emotional Or Verbal Abuse
The abusive emotional behavior may seem unimportant at first, but ongoing
humiliating treatment is a much deeper issue. Behaviors that should be
monitored include insulting you in front of family, friends or co-workers,
forcing you to ask for permission before you can go somewhere, getting angry
at you whether the problem is with you or not, insulting and calling you with
harsh names, and threatening you in order to maintain control - The list goes
on
Long-term emotional abuse can lead to low self-esteem, withdrawal from family
and friends, depression, illness, anxiety, and abandonment of goals. You don't
deserve this treatment, but recognizing and letting your emotional abuser know
is a process that takes time. Take advantage of available resources and
hotlines as you muster the courage to leave the relationship.
4. Body Shaming
When your partner shames you for your weight, appearance, etc., not only is it
cruel, immature, and based in patriarchal falsehoods, but it can also be a
manipulative way to convince you that you'll never be good enough for anybody
else; that you can't leave your relationship, because no one else will ever
love you. It's a sickening method of establishing dominance and control in a
relationship. You're beautiful. Lots of people know you're beautiful. You
don't have to stay with a person whose internal ugliness leads them to try and
convince you otherwise.
5. Negativity
Now, of course negativity will be a part of any relationship in life, but it
shouldn’t take precedence over a positive attitude. A negative outlook on life
will translate into negative thoughts, and ultimately, a negative mind. People
who focus on the negative tend to have low energy, blame others for their
problems, and in general, won’t be the most fun, inspiring people to hang
around. Don’t ever settle for someone who displays such negativity about life
– it will only drag you down in the process.
6. Broken promises
It’s healthy to have some independence in the relationship, but every now and
then, we need to be able to rely on the things our partner tells us. If they
say they can do something, and we depend on them to follow through, they
should do it. End of story. If breaking promises, folding on agreements, and
canceling plans is something you regularly deal with, it’s time to see those
traits for that they are- red flags
7. Disrespect
Fights should be an honest – though admittedly tempestuous – attempt to
resolve a disagreement. If you find that your partner is using them as an
excuse to mistreat you, it’s time to step back and assess whether or not this
relationship is healthy.
You should also be sure to understand that arguments are not the only occasion
during which your partner may show you disrespect. Sometimes, it’s subtle: a
cutting joke they knew would hurt your feelings, a mild refusal to take your
complaints seriously, a sarcastic response to a heartfelt request.
8. Manipulative behavior
Of course, we all lie and it’s okay. However, what is not okay is to be a
chronic liar. One fine morning, you wake up and realize that you are always
the person making compromises in the relationship. Honesty is the foundation
of every relationship, and one cannot sustain a relationship with perpetual
trust issues. Once you fathom that you cannot trust a single word that comes
out of your partner’s mouth, it’s too late. Some white lies help in
maintaining the relationship, but other toxic lies can cause the relationship
to fall apart.
Manipulative people can never be a good company, and being in a relationship
with them can be far too threatening for our emotional well-being.
Relationships stand on the building blocks of unconditional love, support,
understanding, and cooperation.
9. Controlling behavior
People who feel like they must control every aspect of your life, should have
no place in it. If someone implies that they need to know where you are going
and with who because they don’t trust you, and if you’ve given them no reason
to feel this way, then they are being overly controlling. No one can live your
life for you except you, yourself.
Andrea Bonior writes in Psychology Today, “Controlling people use a whole
arsenal of tools in order to dominate their partners— whether they or their
partners realize what’s happening or not. Whether controlling behavior leads
to more severe emotional or physical abuse or not, it is not a healthy
situation.”
10. Lack of accountability.
If they can’t take responsibility for something they do or say, they will
never take you or your relationship seriously. No progress can be made if
someone is unwilling to correct their toxic behavior, and refusing to accept
responsibility is pretty darn toxic. It ends up leaving you with every single
burden to carry, alone, indefinitely. The mental anguish and stress you will
go through isn’t worth it. You deserve to be with someone who will share
everything with you- especially the responsibilities.
Of course, relationships can be difficult at times, and none of us are
perfect. But there are acceptable flaws, and unacceptable flaws.
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