10 Techniques To Win An Argument With A Narcissist
If you have to deal with a narcissist, you should know that narcissists like
to argue. They love to see your reactions and enjoy hearing their voices argue
and make accusations. They are always pointless arguments without a real
result. All they care about is that they are always right.
Narcissists
will never let you win. If you ever try to stand up for yourself and express
your desires and needs, they will blow up the whole thing and make it related
to themselves.
However, what's the correct way to win an argument with a narcissist? What is
the right way to express your feelings?
Here are 10 techniques on
how to win an argument with a narcissist.
How to Win an Argument With a Narcissist:
1- You have the advantage that you know what's going.
2- Arguing gives narcissists the advantage of control.
The main point to note here is that the main goal of a narcissist is CONTROL. They must always remain in control; On top. They will do whatever it takes to get what they want. These people know exactly what they're doing. Narcissists like to manipulate people in order to get what they want. They will give you ultimatums, or blame you for not taking care of them, accuse you of cheating, lying about your illness, and they'll stop at nothing to pull you down. One point that everyone always gets wrong is thinking that arguing with a narcissist is about getting your point across. It is not like this.
3- Choose your battels.
Most arguments with narcissists are a waste of time because it’s not going
to be possible to change their mind or get them to agree with you. Avoid
them when possible.
Stand up for yourself when the matter really
matters. There are arguments that you need to take your position. These can
be things like money, family duties, parenthood, and these require you to
articulate your point of view in a neutral way. However, this will not be
the end of the controversy.
They will keep repeating their points, insisting that you failed as a person. They will continue to shock you, trying to fight a huge battle. Keep stating your point, and try not to say anything else, as that gives them ammunition to delve into hurting you, hitting you from any and all angles of attack.
4- Keep your voice calm and stay composed.
When the narcissist rages and yells, don’t meet their volume. Instead, keep the calm and steady tone that a person would use when trying to reason with a tantruming child. If you become so frustrated that you start yelling as loudly as they are, you may find that they’ll abruptly stop yelling themselves, and calmly say to you, “Hey, you need to calm down—why are you getting so worked up?” That leaves you feeling disoriented, defensive, and tempted to start arguing about whose reality is correct.
5- Narcissists lack empathy.
The other thing you need to be aware of when dealing with narcissists is that they completely lack any empathy. They are not afraid to hurt you in an argument. When I argue with anyone who lacks sympathy, I will say something hurtful but I will immediately apologize and feel bad. But is it the same with narcissists? They don't feel that.
Related Article: 10 things that make a narcissist miserable
6- Don’t defend or explain yourself.
7- Narcissists want to make you feel inferior.
As a result, an argument about the smallest of issues can escalate quickly and fiercely. Something you may have thought of as unimportant, or even irrelevant, has been blown into a relationship-ending level row. They've spent your entire relationship working out how to push your buttons, and they will use everything in their power to make you feel insignificant and small.
8- Don't take the bait yourself
You must be aware of the topics that do not make sense. Narcissists want to watch you turn. This is why you need to look closely at the nature of this argument and determine whether it is worth your time. Sometimes narcissists want to urge you to respond and stand up for yourself. They will lie and fake things about you. They will accuse you of being mean to them.
9- Hold on to your reality.
10- Avoid confrontation during lying and defamation campaigns.
It may seem like this might backfire but listen: there is hardly any profit in an argument with a narcissist. I understand that most of us cannot take a threat to our integrity, but you have to learn that narcissists are not normal people. Narcissists make up lies to provoke anger. They slander you and launch smear campaigns to discredit you in front of others. This causes you to confront them about their strange behavior and how blatantly they are lying. They enjoy bringing you to them like a leash puppy or a fish on bait.
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